The bee's maker

I sit here with the back door open and I am listening to the birds chirping. I am thinking about how beautiful God's creation is and then I remember, oh yeah, I am part of that too. If He could create such a world to be so great and perfect why do I question how He created me.

I know I have bipolar but he knows too. I know I have an anxiety disorder, but He knows too. He created me to be me. Unique and special in every way. Psalm 139:14 states, " I will praise thee: for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works." So He made me and called me marvellous. That's pretty awesome. Now some days I don't always feel awesome. I just feel a little fearfully, but He still loves me then. He loves me no matter what. He loves me so much He sent His son to die on the cross for me. Now that's pretty special.

So as you go through your day to day walk. Find things that God created and realize you can just look in the mirror and see one of His prized creations.

The Bee's Mask

How is it that you can be surrounded by wonderful people and still feel alone? I often feel that way. My own insecurities get in the way. They are always whispering in my ear to keep me from being the true me. That I know is Satan's tactics to keep me down, but why do I listen to him and allow him to determine my mood or my mindset. I have listened to him so long that I believe Him that God's promises are foreign to me. I know what they say but do I believe them in my heart. It's that part of "renewing of your mind" part that I have trouble with. I often put a mask on that everything is ok, not always but sometimes. Mostly in public where I am constantly looking over my shoulder wondering who is saying what. I deal with that mostly because of my weight. Why can't I just take the mask off or why can't I be secure in who I am? I know I can in Christ, but knowing and doing is a much harder task. My prayer is that I can just be me. That I can be in a crowd and stand tall and proud of who I am and who God has made me. That I can stop wearing masks and let people know what is truly going on inside so they can pray for me. I pray that others, as well as myself, will listen to the one true voice and not those negative voices of Satan keeping us defeated.

The Bee depending on God

I have always been an independent person. Relying on myself and also blaming myself for the problems that arise. I used to carry alot of guilt, but as time has gone by I have learned there is no need to carry all the burdens. Jesus took care of everything at Calvary. This week has been an eventful week for my family. My husband and I had our 13 anniversary. We went on a little trip while the kids stayed with their Grandma (Ma Boo) and they went on a little trip. Well, while we were 7 hours away our car died. I mean D I E D to the graveyard it went. But we stranded on had no idea what to do, so my husband got on the phone and to make a long story short a church full of people came through for us and helped us out with a loving hand. I doubted once again, Philippians 4:19, "But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus." But why do I doubt Him, he has always come through for me and He went above and beyond by dieing for me on the cross. So the end of the story is a another church gave us a car. Why do I get discouraged? Why do I worry or fret? Why do I feel defeated? Because that is how Satan wants us to feel. Those feelings are from Satan. I know feel blessed beyond measure.a I was a little afraid that circumstantial depression would set in. That is a depression that is caused because of the things that you are going through not a chemical change. That is probably the most typical of all the depressions. But how could I get depressed, because I had been so richly blessed. So when you get down and discouraged, begin to think on the blessings that you have. Make a list of all the things you are thankful for and read it over and over again. That is enough to make you forget the circumstances that you are in and just allow you to praise the Lord with a thankful heart.